LATEST POSTS


  • Early morning on Lake Shore Drive

    maze of brown
    at the center, trees
    empty of leaves,
    row after row stretching
    to scattered hazel

    edging the lake,
    its soft fog settled,
    tissue-papers,
    still, grey, jade mist,
    dull pearl, kingdom come

  • The heart needs good work

    All that comes to me now
    is the prairie, how it is empty
    to the casual eye, how you walk
    or see for miles, alone,
    how you wonder ever why
    on the absence of your fellow creatures.

    Will you get another dog? it asks me,
    or a grandmother, or husband, or son?

    Do they make more? I ask back.
    I think not.

    Alive in its own work
    of flowers and bees,
    oaks and woodchucks,
    the prairie is barren to my eyes,
    and I am a puzzle to it.
    As I wade through its brush,
    my heart hollow as lead
    twitches feral for good work.

  • Small endurances

    Puddles of snow
    pool under shrubs –
    miniature glaciers
    for voles to cast through.

    Sparrows, geese, all as one
    gather round the warmth
    floating up
    from the subway grate.

    Frozen, withered leaves
    dangle under squirrel’s tiny pads
    stirring breath
    in the still air.

    Here, in a far corner of my heart
    a soft flutter —
    you are not yet gone.
    I warm myself near.

  • On losing Sunny

    Our communion last night
    was pizza and chocolates
    and trailing conversation,
    a wide prairie for your memory
    to bound through.

    You settled into our center –

    How we loved you,
    how you made us laugh
    and roll our eyes and
    fake scold you,
    how you took that bait
    and we took yours,

    how you will fill our center
    again and again
    on cherished, patient evenings
    when we talk of childhood
    and Christmases, beach days and
    basketball on the patio,

    how we will always
    be glad it was you,
    and no one else,
    how we will always
    welcome you back,
    hearts relieved, swollen.

    ———

    Another loss, hard in its own way, our beloved dog Sunny passed away two days ago.

    I am unilaterally declaring 2017 the year of healing and renewal. It has been such a tough couple months and it seems like this blog has taken on the cast of a journal rather than whatever I intended (whatever that was). It’s nice have an optimistic plan, but I know another couple of big ones are coming.

    Find your peace —

  • Last breaths

    Evergreens surround your house,
    a fortress wall heavy with snow.
    In black recesses I wade,

    the snow bounds off the branches
    finds bare ankles inside my boots,
    my hair, a teaspoon down my collar.

    I approach your home
    to find windows boarded and
    roof patched.

    You are dying there,
    heaving, uneven breaths,
    a fortress with no treasure

    except silence
    and blue light reflecting
    off white.

    The grimy sky hovers,
    its cold rolling in.
    We wait.

    ———-
    On watching Bonni.

  • On healing and revolution

    Gazing up this terrible mountain,
    you say, love is not enough,
    though when I add together
    everything else
    and stack it high above my head,
    everything else is not enough either.

    So I fall back on love,
    and it nudges me
    back to the task of gathering
    everything I can find – a pick ax,
    courage, fellow travelers –
    not to stack and measure,
    but to begin our ascent regardless.

    ———
    From Hafiz, ‘The subject tonight is love’ (trans. Daniel Ladinsky).

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Copyright by Jenifer Cartland
jenifercartland@gmail.com